I first came across "tantric massage" 20 years ago through a book by Kenneth Ray Stubbs. But it wasn't until the fall of 2019 when I received a lingam massage and my own energy channels opened up widely that I really started to experience the depth and width of it and started giving yoni massages more often to a couple of women. Studying more (both video courses of yoni- and taomassage, and live teachings), I now combine it with my knowledge of energy channels like the microcosmic orbit and the body's yin/yang flow, and it has became a ceremony of worshiping the divine feminine.
In our society, many men have littered the path into the yoni with their own lower urge to release themselves, dump their load, fed by sexualized imagery. And that, together with shame and all shoulds and should-nots, leaves scars in the hearts of women, blocking off parts of their feeling, their openness and ultimately the creative forces themselves. Few people have a healthy relationship with their own sexuality, and a so called "tantric massage" can help to heal this, to release blockages and de-armour this source of all creation.
In being honored to deeply touch the inner essence of a woman, to experience her whole being open up in an increasing flow, I really feel the base point of the creative forces in the universe.
A tantric yoni massage opens up for a full flow of life through the very potent energy source of the womb, opening up for healing in all areas of life. It is beautiful to witness and a deep honor to facilitate and assist in opening this flow.
The word yoni is sanskrit, योनि and has many meanings: place of birth, source, origin, spring, fountain, place of rest, repository, receptacle, seat, abode, home, lair, nest, stable, the womb, uterus, vulva, vagina, female organs of generation. – Christopher Hareesh Wallis
Treading the path toward the origin must be done with open intuition, feeling into the woman and building trust, step by step releasing tension. It is always different, but this is what this ceremony could be like:
Before I meet her, I make sure that I am in my own flow. I do my daily ceremony, renewing and affirming connection to ancestors and helper spirits, and let go of any blockages in my own body. I put myself into a mindset of grace, a state of reverence of the divine, doing qi gong to have my energies in order. Clearing and setting the space.
Meeting her, feeling the flow of love, I hold the space in openness. I feel into her body with my awareness, and let her express where she is in her beingness right now, what draws her attention and where insecurities might lie. Meeting in a long hug, relaxing, and sitting down in eye gazing for a while, allowing for whatever comes up.
The massage starts with guiding her into a relaxed state. I place my still hands on energy centers, for her to let her thoughts rest, let go of disharmony, receive acceptance, open up for curiousity and freedom in centeredness. She is reminded throughout to breathe deeply all the way down to the perineum. With flowing strokes I start to balance and invite flow to her energy channels all through the body. I move as in qi gong, breathing out when stroking away from my body, breathing in on the way back. Only soft touch on yin channels, a gentle pressure on yang. Tactile massage mostly, some muscle massage where needed, mostly on neck and shoulders (but when more tension is present, deeper muscle work could be done before the energy massage to get an uninterrupted flow). Following the microcosmic orbit going up her spine and neck, down the front to perineum… Flowing out in legs and arms. I activate energy centers in her heart and sacrum with a soft knocking, then mixing the chi from those energy centers in a flow around the spine. All the while I keep a meditative mind and the energy in my own body flows up my spine and out into my hands with every breath.
After massaging the whole body - neck, head and face, every finger and toe - having the flow open all the way, if she feels ready and open, I sit down by the yoni and start with connecting to her heart. I awake her own sexual energy from the heart and breasts and direct it down the front energy channels to open up the yoni with a jing chi flow, softly massaging the whole area around yoni, pubic bone, perineum and labia, applying some pressure to tensions and hardened spots. Any emotions may rise up, and all emotional expression is welcome. There are often a lot of feelings repressed and stored away as blockages in this area, and the flow of energy starts to pull forth that which can be handled and released in a safe space.
If invited into the yoni (by energetic pull and verbal affirmation) the massage continues to feel out and stimulate blockages inside, all around the vaginal walls. The tensions many women carry in this area are often unknown even to herself, and thereby neglected in self care, but can really open up to a much higher flow of life over time when released. It is often hardened to a level of muscle knots, and can be painful in the beginning; to be breathed through (or screamed out) and let go. Sometimes direct memories of traumatic events can come up, but often just a flow of different emotions. All emotions are welcome to come up, be expressed, and flow through.
Going deeper to the cervix, there is often a very tangible flow of vibrating energy that is being freed up and activated by the massage. Keeping a finger on the cervix, I let the jing flow down the back of the vaginal wall to the perineum and I direct it back to the coccyx and up the spine. I remind her to breathe all the way down and let the energy all the way up to the crown of her head. Instructing her to keep the tongue to the palate so the energy can trickle down her throat, filling up the chi repositories in any organs needing it. The excess is readily stored in tan tien below the navel.
When the energy starts landing, I balance it out with a whole body yin/yang massage before covering her with a soft blanket. The candle burning in stillness, I sit in present silence until she is ready to sit up. With a cup of herbal tea, we do a sharing of the experience and following up what's been drawn to the surface. Perhaps I show her some simple qi gong techniques to keep renewing the energy flow before parting. Gratitude in awe.
Thank you 🙏
Note: I am not a professional masseur or therapist. I do not do this for money, and this is just a description of my limited personal experience. I am still new at this and am learning every time, but I feel this is something greatly needed in humanity and I am deeply honored to be a small part of opening up for deeper self realization in the receiver of this ceremony.
PS: This is not a traditional "tantrik" practice in any way. I use the term "tantric massage" as it is used in the neo-tantric community.
Feel free to contact me if you are interested in receiving a massage, and we'll see how the energy flows 💞 https://m.me/fiddur